Monday, September 3, 2012

Match Making For Boomers: 4 Tips to Avoid Headache of "Why ...

So you go out on a date with a lovely woman and you feel like you hit it off well. You give her your number and then return home, almost immediately waiting in anticipation for her to call. Perhaps you met a nice girl at a social even or a bar, and after hitting it off you give her your number and await her call so you can meet again. While awaiting her call hours seem like days and days appear to become weeks and you start to feel as if you may never hear from her. Who among us has not been in this situation? To help anyone struggling through the self-imposed nightmare, here are a couple items to consider when to avoid the nerve-racking situation.

Tip 1: Have a Proactive Plan

Instead of simply giving your number to her and hoping she calls, try to exchange numbers and let her know that you will call her. Asking her for her number is an easy way to avoid the torment of awaiting her call. If you use this tactic, it is still best to wait two-to-three days before you call to see if she decides to call you. Avoid calling her too soon. If you must leave a message, inform her that YOU will call back in a couple of days and leave your number in case she lost it. If this tactic fails more than twice, it is best to move on.

Tip 2: Remember to Stay Realistic

If you were unable to obtain her number and she has not been calling back, remember that given the hectic lifestyle of today's individual there are a plethora of reasons they have not called. Perhaps she has not called because it is her workweek. She could have fallen ill, or had packed her schedule before meeting with you. There is always the possibility that she is out of town or dealing with a personal or family issue. Remaining optimistic for the first week not only makes it easier on you, but also helps you sound upbeat when she does call.

Tip 3: Do not Panic if the Worst Occurs

If she simply does not call, remember to not to blow it out of proportion. Sometimes people simply do not call back. It may not be any issue other than they just did not have time or interest at that moment. It is nothing to take personal and with over seven billion people in the world, it is hardly worth losing one's cool over. So stay loose, do not panic, and remember that if you are able to gain her number, you stay calm and positive, you have the best possible chance of surviving the dreaded wait.

Tip 4: Distract yourself

When I am stuck in such a position, I look for activities and stimuli that will distract me from torturing myself about wondering why the woman is not calling me. The worst thing you can do is sit around and think about it. What good will stewing on the possibilities do? It will do no good at all.

I often keep the phone away from me as well and allow myself to see it only once an hour at most. This boundary allows me to be forced to engage in the aforementioned activities without distraction and allows time to pass more quickly and without neurotic anguish. I even keep it far enough away that I could not hear it if it rang at all. If I am truly desperate to break the curse of constant wondering I simply turn off the phone altogether.

While there is no way to wholly avoid the self-imposed trial of waiting on someone to call you, it is at least remedied in part by focusing your mind elsewhere and attempting to not allow the situation to control your day and thus your life.

Charles Brian is a relationship coach and enjoys giving his best advice like how to fix a relationship and is she cheating on you. Providing quality reviews, articles and writings on love, dating, relationships and marriage online.

Source: http://matchmakingforbloomers.blogspot.com/2012/09/4-tips-to-avoid-headache-of-doesnt-she.html

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